To Let Go
by NaruFMAfangirl
Summary: It's my fault, all of it. I didn't mean it to end this way. Can you ever forgive me?


Well here's another one. I'm so mean to Naruto in these. So enjoy the story and after you're done be sure to press that little button to review. You know you want to. I love some feedback. This is not Yaoi or anything else.

The line in the middle of the page is a flashback

Small line page is a break

Disclaimer: Must I spell it out?

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To Let Go

Something had been wrong, very wrong, for awhile now. I couldn't quite put my finger on it and it's not like I made a move to find out what. Well…at least not till a week ago. I finally got the nerve to ask Kakashi and Sakura if they noticed it. Still I did not get the wanted answers.

Sakura said he was as "normal" as he could get. Always laughing and smiling; just being his obnoxious self. Kakashi was as equally non-helpful. He just kept saying how he never knew I had a heart in that annoying way of his. Whatever. In the end I got the same answer from him.

But something was wrong. I could feel it, see it. He was different then before. Not that I thought everything would go to the way it was, but he was just off. I mean…just- how could they not see it!?!

So I spent the next six days trying to come up with a way to ask him. It's not like I cared that much. Why am I even doing this? So what if he acted different?

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"Umm…What's up with you?" Wow. A whole six days and this is what I come up with? Maybe I should actually practice my social skills.

Naruto, laying there covered in sweat that matted his blond hair to his forehead, looked equally as confused with my apparent show of concern.

I was waiting for the right moment to approach when I saw him training alone. So thinking 'why not' I waited till he was done and walked up to the blue-eyed enigma.

"You seem…different." Yep, this going so well for me. I don't need my pride.

Naruto pushes himself off the grass and dusts off. Wiping some sweat out of his eyes he raises his head to look at me. I avert my eyes pretending I really wasn't that interested.

A sigh emanated from him, "Everyone changes Sasuke."

I snapped my eyes back to him and had to keep myself from flinching. That was the last answer I expected. I knew something was wrong, and now looking at his eyes there was no longer any doubt.

There are dark circles under his eyes, and his eyes. His eyes that I'm so used to see shining are dulled. Some of my surprise must have shown on my face against all my efforts because his face split into a huge smile meant to hide everything from everyone.

"I'm fine!" I didn't believe him. I had to once again stop from flinching. Since when had his smiles become so fake, so lifeless?

I could see him getting nervous because I haven't responded.

"Okay then. Well, bye." He gathers his things and walks off the training grounds leaving me there. Now what?

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So now it's midnight and I'm pacing in my room. I figured out why I thought he seemed different, but not why he is. What would make Naruto of all people have those kind of eyes? Eyes that scream defeat. No, they didn't belong on him.

That wasn't the only thing bothering me. I couldn't quite place it, again. This was getting really annoying. Even when he wasn't trying he got on my nerves.

Heaving a frustrated sigh I flopped down face first on my bed. The feeling something bad was going to happen made me fidget and my stomach churn. Something something, always something with no definite point to be found.

I pound my fist into the mattress and hefting myself up, I walk down the stairs. I find my sandals, walk out, and close the door. If I ever wanted to sleep again I was going to have to face this.

Taking off into the cloudless night it takes me only a couple minutes to reach Naruto's apartment building. I start up to his floor not wanting to go through the window. At least I could try saving some of my dignity and that did not involve explaining why I was sneaking into his apartment in the dead of night. This was already putting me way out of my comfort zone.

Finally I reach his door and knock. No answer, not that it's that surprising considering he sleeps like a bear in hibernation. I knock louder a couple more times with still no results. The last of my patience leaves me so I use a little chakra to unlock the door.

I ease quietly inside and close the door. I turn around taking in the small living room, if you could call it that. I take two steps and I'm in the center of the room. In a split second the feeling of wrong turns to dread and it takes me only a second more to realize why. A second too long.

There's a sickly metallic smell throughout the apartment that belongs to only one thing. Blood, and lots of it. I run into Naruto's bedroom.

The moment I cross the doorway I freeze. There lying propped up against the wall on his bed is Naruto covered in blood. His arms limp on either side of his body reveal two deeply slit wrists.

I scream at my body to move. Too slowly I move to the right side off his bed and grab both his wrists, covering them with the best of my ability to make the bleeding stop. There's just so much blood.

"Naruto? Naruto you got to stay awake okay. You'll be okay. I'll take you to the hospital and they'll help you." My voice is panicked, but I don't care, not now. "Naruto you hear me? You'll be fine okay. Don't worry I'm-"

"Sasuke." It was not even a whisper, but it had the same effect as if he had yelled my name.

"Shhh. You shouldn't talk." I tighten the grip on his wrists in a vain attempt to stop the blood from continuing to flow. "You'll be okay." I don't know who I'm talking to anymore.

"Sasuke….please…stop." For a second everything stops and his intentions become clear.

"Sasuke I want…the pain…to…stop." A strangled sob escapes my throat.

"No. Please." My voice now only a whisper. For the first time since I arrived I look up at his face. Another sob sounds as I stare at him. His eyes have dulled to the point where they are grey with tears leaking down in tiny streams.

I see him begging me with dulled eyes to let go, let him go. Against my will my hands loosen their grip and once again the blood flows freely staining everything in its path. I want to look away so badly from those eyes, but I'm afraid he won't be there when I look back.

"Ari…ga..to. Sa…suke." And just like that I watch helplessly as the last remaining life fades from his broken eyes. The saddest smile I've ever seen is still on his face. I can't help feel it's the realest one he's ever smiled.

"Naruto? Naruto!? Nartuo!" I grab his lifeless shoulders and shake him as my shouts grow more frenzied. Not again! I don't want to lose someone important again. "Please don't leave me alone!"

I stop shaking him and it's starting to sink in. He's gone. I pull his body against mine. For the first time since my family died, I can't stop crying.

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The days leading up to the funeral are all in a haze. I can't really remember anything other then the broken emptiness. I vaguely know I talked to Kakashi and Sakura. I think they might be worried, but I just don't care.

It was a small funeral. Only the Hokage, the rookie nine, Gai's team, and his teachers were there. Many were crying, but I just stood there letting my mask cover my face so there was no emotion on this cloudy day. As they lowered my brother into the ground they buried my heart with him.

That was two days ago, but it seems like a year has already passed. I stand at his grave just watching, waiting for anything. Sakura comes up beside me but I pay her no mind. If I wait she'll leave.

"Why?" It takes me a second to realize that it was me who spoke. I see Sakura glance at me then she looks back to his grave.

"I asked Kakashi-sensei that too." She pauses then continues in a more subdued tone. "He told me Naruto has always had a hard life when it came to the villagers, but it got worse after you left. They blamed him for you leaving and treated him even worse."

She takes a fractured breath, "I should have noticed; paid more attention to him!" She's sniffing now. "Naruto was really happy you came back, you have to remember that Sasuke. But Kakashi said that, maybe, when you came back and Naruto saw how they just accepted you after what you did, that he may have felt like it wasn't worth it. I'm so sorry Sasuke."

Sakura's crying now and runs away. I just stand here; there's no reason to go after her. She should have noticed! They all should have noticed!

But still it was me. Me who killed him. I left to gain the power I wanted and to protect them, but because of that I killed him, my best friend, my brother.

I finally look up and notice it's dark. I don't know how long I've been standing here. Only the thought I killed him stays with me.

I start the walk back to my house and realize more people will be at my funeral then Naruto's. That just shouldn't be. I don't deserve it.

"I'll see you soon Naruto."


End file.
